Things Fall Apart

I have been feeling very overwhelmed lately. Juggling too many balls and dropping quite a few. Today, I realized that we had stopped having our weekly family meeting. We have been so busy that we forgot about it (at least I did) and as a result our lives seemed to have dropped into chaos hell.

The last time we had a family meeting was probably early November before we got carried away by the holiday season and spent more time partying than we should have. Unfortunately, the impact has been huge; missed deadlines, forgotten social engagements, paying rush fees for things I forgot to order . . . the list is endless.

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,

William Butler Yeats (The Second Coming)

It’s time to reinstate the family weekly meeting so that I can reclaim some sanity. The structure that we use is a mix of different ideas from workshops we have attended in the past plus strategies from our daily activities at work. Use this as a foundation to build a structure that works for you (as a family or as an individual).

The very first meeting you have will be very different form the second meeting, so I will describe both meetings in separate posts. In this post we will discuss the first meeting.

Set a specific day and time for the meeting:

1. Consistency is key. Pick a day and time that you can commit to every week.
2. Plan at least an hour for the meeting, especially for the initial meeting.
3. After a few weeks, a half hour will suffice unless you have some big projects to tackle.
4. Select a day when you will be least tired and can have the meeting at a decent hour.
5. Do not have meetings after 8:30pm. People are tired and likely to get cranky.

During the meeting discuss and document the upcoming weekly & monthly calendar for each person (children included). The calendar should be categorized under 3 headings:

1. Events - These are activities that usually trigger tasks and appointments and require advance planning. Events should be included on the calendar as soon as you are aware of them. For example, you receive an invite for your cousin’s wedding in June. This should be discussed at your very next meeting and listed as an Event. Decide if you will attend the wedding and then immediately create any necessary tasks and appointments for that event. The wedding may be out of town, which will mean plane tickets and hotel rooms. These tasks require advance planning and you do not want to wait till the last minute.
2. Tasks – Include anything that you need to do that week that is outside of your normal routine e.g. buy plane tickets, clean out the garage, pay bills.
3. Appointments – Include any specific activities with a set date and time e.g. doctor, dentist, and salon.

Some items will appear on multiple calendars. Each person should be able to easily identify their individual items for the week.

In the next post, we will discuss the structure of the second meeting. The second meeting sets the agenda that you will use for future meetings. During this meeting, you review the past week’s calendar and prepare for the following week.

Stay tuned for the next post. In the meantime, please share with us your tips and tricks for managing your life.