I hardly used to think about old age but . . .

Rafiki: I hardly used to think about old age but recently I have wondered what kind of old person I will be.

Red Jade: Ha, ha....now what made you think of that? How bizarre!

Rafiki: Then I realized, if I put some thought to it, I can do something now to determine my attitude when I grow old. I am bizarre like that :-)

Red Jade: Still cracking up . . . but maybe I shouldn't. Are you scared of getting old?

Rafiki: No, I am not scared of getting old but now that I’ve seen an early gray hair I have realized it will be a reality. Anyway the thought came to me because I went to visit a nursing home and it seemed like there was a wide array of attitudes that did not necessarily have anything to do with their circumstances.

Red Jade: I can definitely see that. Many people are very negative in their old age. Perhaps it's because of unrealized dreams?

Rafiki: It is weird but as I visited a few rooms I realized that it was not so much about unrealized dreams but more about holding on to the past and onto attitudes they have about others. It made me wonder - when I am old who will I be angry at? and why?

Red Jade: Probably who you are angry at now and the reasons will probably be the same then! Holding onto the past means not letting go. Anger means that you have neither forgiven nor forgotten. I read something about a couple of years ago that resonated deeply, that "failure to forgive is like drinking poison and hoping someone else dies!" It was one of those aha moments and I immediately made a decision to forgive and forget. I remember that I felt a weight lifted immediately off my chest.

Rafiki: That is such a powerful truth. Another realization I made at the nursing home was that the people who had learned to laugh at life seemed to carry less of that baggage. It also seemed like the people who had strong relationships, both inside and outside the home, were more positive.

Red Jade: Certainly laughter is good for the soul and the mind. But is it possible to teach ourselves to laugh at life? Or is that just an innate personality trait?

Rafiki: I think it comes more easily to some than others but I do think we can learn how to approach life with a lightness of heart. I found an interesting article by Chuck Gallozzi about laughter and he says that we can actually teach ourselves how to bring more laughter into our lives. http://www.personal-development.com/chuck/learning-to-laugh.htm

Red Jade: Interesting article . . . love the idea of the laughing club. I need to check one out. I could always use a few good laughs. How did you end up in the nursing home anyway? Visiting someone you know?

Rafiki: Yes, I was visiting a friend. I love hanging out with her because I realize that though important to me, the concerns I have today will someday be a distant memory. It helps me deal with life from a wider vision. In any case, my conclusion is that when I grow old I still want to be cute and love shoes. That should keep me happy enough. Have you ever thought about what kind of an old person you would like to be?

Red Jade: You will always be cute! No, I have never thought about it before. I want to party all night and not have to wake up until high noon!

Rafiki: That will definitely renew your youth as long as your body will cooperate.

Red Jade: Yeah, party will be on, bring your dancing shoes!

Rafiki: On a serious note though, thinking about what kind of old person we want to be helps us think about what kind of person we are and who we are becoming. I’ve been able to learn a lot about myself through this process.

Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.

- Roosevelt

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